I don’t want to write another anti-VAR article, I’m not going to do it… I'm totally not going to talk about how watching the Argentina vs. Egypt game completely short-circuited my brain. I will not even mention how Egypt scores a brilliant breakaway goal to put them up 2-0 on the defending champions. The stadium erupts, shirts are flying off, and a historic upset is brewing.
Then comes the dreaded finger-to-the-ear gesture.
VAR proceeds to rewind the tape a full 17 seconds and 100 yards down the pitch to find a moment where Egypt’s player lightly stepped on the Argentinian sticker’s toe while Argentina was on the attack. I’m not going to mention, the referee on the field looked right at the physical challenge in real-time, deemed it completely fine, and let play continue. But no, tech-bro micro-dissection rules the day. The goal is wiped off the board, and Argentina gets a free kick on the literal other end of the earth.
To put this into perspective for American Football fans, imagine this: The Dallas Cowboys are playing the Philadelphia Eagles. The Eagles have a grueling drive, but on 3rd down, the Cowboys stop them. Philadelphia is forced to punt. CeeDee Lamb fields the punt, weaves through three defenders, hits the sideline, and takes it 80 yards to the house for a spectacular touchdown.
The stadium is rocking, the fireworks are going off, and then the head referee walks to the center of the field and says:
"After booth review, we are going back to the 3rd down play prior to the punt. There was an uncalled defensive holding penalty on the Cowboys. Therefore, the punt return touchdown is canceled. The Eagles will be awarded a first down at the 35-yard line."
People would burn the stadium down! It completely violates the spirit of sports. It's killing the spontaneous joy of a goal.
But, as I said before, I’m not going to talk about any of that. What I took away from watching the World Cup is: I finally know what it feels like to be a Dallas Cowboys fan for the last 30 years.
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Think about it. We are trapped in the exact same psychological torment. Every single tournament cycle, USMNT fans pull on the jersey and convince themselves that "This is our year." We boast about our "Golden Generation." We look at the roster on paper and see guys playing for elite European giants like Christian Pulisic, Weston McKennie, and Gio Reyna, and we start planning the parade route. We act like global soccer royalty because of our individual brands, commercial appeal, and high-profile marketing.
We are literally the soccer equivalent of the Dallas Cowboys bragging about having Dak Prescott, CeeDee Lamb, and Quinnen Williams in mid August.
And just like the Cowboys, the USMNT are the ultimate chronic underachievers. We look absolutely dominant in our own local sandbox. We beat up on our CONCACAF neighbors, win the Nations League, take the Gold Cup, and talk trash to Mexico. We are the kings of the "regular season." But the absolute second we match up against elite, heavyweight postseason competition on the world stage—the metaphorical equivalents of the San Francisco 49ers or Green Bay Packers in the playoffs—the entire glass house completely shatters.
We lack that gritty, ugly, defensive "dog" in us when a game turns into a street fight. Instead, we get tactical whiplash. We go through endless coaching carousels, looking for a savior to unlock the “Ferrari of a roster”, only to get bounced in devastating fashion while the entire rest of the world watches with popcorn in hand. Sound familiar??
I want to be a fan of United States Soccer, but I can’t live in a world where I’m a Cowboy’s fan. It’s just so gross. We are better than that!
Come on team USA. Let’s get our “stuff” together, bury the overhype, and take a look at what this team really is. America’s team is truly looking like “America’s Team” and that is just sad.